Another Day...

Every day is unique at the Miller/Smith household. That's why I am the way I am! :)
Grandma is still able to get around to the bathroom, except for when her temperature is really high. At night sometimes she can't make it, so we have a porta-potty available for her. Nightlife around here is interesting. She is usually active around 2-5...so Lani and I are up with her about that time. For the most part, after 5 or 5:30 she sleeps well. Last night wasn't so good, she threw up again...which made her feel awful today. However, we had lots of company today and she was up and responsive when they were here. People charge her up, so even if she isn't feeling well she will wake up and "try" to entertain. :) That's just Grandma!

I think the hardest thing right now is when she gets in these really emotional moods. She'll be fine for a while, and then start crying and crying and saying stuff like "I'm sorry I won't be here to love you" or "I hope the girls know that I tried to fight...". I'll just hold her hand or kiss her face and say, "It's ok, Grandma...we understand...I love you." When she's in these moments, it's almost like she's in another part of her mind. That's what her anxiety meds help with, so we try to keep them faithfully flowing through her every 4 hours as suggested.

Please be praying for all of us here (here whole family)...some of us are dealing with this better than others. I guess this is the way it is in any family, but it's hard that right now it's mine. Some of us only cry in the dark, with no one around...others of us feel aright with being all "teary-eyed"...some, you have no idea what they're thinking or feeling (and they don't care to tell you). So, pray for me, as I try my best to be a comfort to my family...sometimes I don't know how.

Thank you, from all my family, for those who have called, sent cards, and have come by to visit. It means so much to all of us (especially to Grandma) that people are showing the love they have in their heart, and loving us with love of Christ. Just so you know...it would be better for us if those of you who call would do so after 10am and before 10pm. The home phone is in the living room, and that's where Grandma, Lani and I are sleeping. Thank you! You are greatly appreciated. For those of you who need the home phone, email me and I will give it to you.

Love you lots!
Jessica