Being Honest

I've decided to use this blogsite to be honest. Ok, yes, with you (the readers), but mainly with myself...and that seems to be really important at the moment.
I don't know how well people will take to that...
Seeing as I am well known by many (well, those who know me),
and in some circles am suppose to have it all together.

"Well, I'm in a Bible School...learning how to minister...working with AIMers,
for goodness sakes!"

But, in all honesty...I feel like a wreck.

I love what I do, where I am, where God's taking me!!! How I feel about me is not a reflection on that aspect of my life at all. Some days, I feel like, being here...doing what I'm doing...is the only thing keeping me sane.

But, even though I love what I'm doing (all of it);
I don't understand myself...
I feel lost...
I neglect my food consumption on purpose some days...
I'm negative of myself, far more than I'll be of anyone else--ever!...
I find most days to be hard to deal with right now.

And yet...

I know God loves me...
I have an amazing source of His Family around me...
I am seeking advice and help for the journey...
I am reaching out...
I am making changes, slowly.

Please be praying for me, and that I will let God heal and grow me.
That I can use this time to dig deep, and that satan will stay far from me.

Love you all!