In some ways it's hard for me to believe that it has been a whole year already since my Grandma died. Friday, March 28th--12:30am. I can still remember the week leading up to that night when I came into the living room and my aunt Lani told me that she was gone. I still remember the sinking feeling that I got, and the bravery I felt that I needed to maintain in order to tell everyone else in the house that she was gone. I remember the madness that seemed to come from that moment on. Supposedly there is suppose to be peace, and in a since there was...but really, it was just more stress. I remember going to sleep as soon as my Uncle Andy and Aunt Robin got to the house, exhausted. When I woke up, I jumped into gear preparing for the memorial service which would be on Sunday. I was so thankful for Alex being there! He helped me with the memorial slide-show, while I got the poster board together. It was good to have another pair of hands. My family was really greif-stricken, and so I felt so blessed to have him available to help me...and he has a huge help! I will never be able to repay him for that week he spent there with my family and me. I guess I'll just have to marry him! :)
It's been a whole year since then, yet I still miss her terribly! Whenever I hear the Chris Rice's song "untitled", I cry...because it was in her service. The songs that I sang to her that night she died still touch my heart when I sing them in church with my brothers and sisters. Whenever I see the color orange or wear it (which is rarely), I think of her. Whenever I pick up a pen and card to write someone, I think of her...even when I put the stamp on it! Whenever I hear the Gather's Vocal Band singing, or see a British Comedy on PBS...I think of her. She is in so much of my person, and God used her to grow so much of who I am. I am grateful for all the good things that were placed within my heart because of her: A love for Missions, a love for Singing, a love for encouraging people, a love for writing, a love adventure, and so much more! I am indebted to her, and so I hope that in seeking to honor her I can pass on the love and good things that she poured into me into others!
